Code Lotto
by RubiconLove
Summary: Their objective was simple if followed out accordingly. Grab the girl and make bank…. Now what if the group of miscreants were to have accidentally grabbed the wrong girl? AU KakaSaku


Once when Kakashi was around twenty years old he dated a girl who was studying psychology as her major.

Their dates-no matter the location- consisted of drawn out conversations about the mind and human behavior. Everything and everybody would be under her observation and she would rudely point out their 'abnormal' behaviors. It didn't matter how small the detail, if they slouched they were insecure. If they were fidgety they were struggling with some inner turmoil… On more than one occasion Kakashi had to kindly point out that after standing for so long in an amusement park waiting to go on a thirty second long ride, people do tend to get a little tired and slouch. And yes, waiting in the line at a single person restroom did tend to make people fidgety. Most of the time she would shake off his conclusions and then ramble on about nonsensical stuff while he did his very best to block her out.

Their relationship hadn't lasted longer than four months.

If he remembered correctly there was one time when she went off for hours about personality disorders and self inflicted injuries. Apparently reasons for self inflicted pain is used as a distraction, to release tension, to feel something physical, to express themselves, to punish themselves and an endless list of other reasons. She had worryingly stated how terrible and unfortunate it was that people felt the need to hurt themselves, and if he considered hurting himself or ever met somebody who fantasized about self inflicted pain- to make sure to get help immediately. He had agreed wholeheartedly and that was the end of that conversation.

Kakashi Hatake was not a man with a masochistic personality, nor did he have some sort of mental illness...

No, he was just the unfortunate soul who was stuck cleaning up a mess that he did not make in the first place.

And by no means was self inflicting injuries to your person anything to make light of, he still couldn't help but fantasize about him killing himself via traumatic ways. It was how he coped.

Bluggering himself with a hammer sounded like a very appealing option at the moment. Or maybe bathing in raw meat and then lying out on a very hot summer day to let the crows attack him...

Perhaps-

Kakashi cringed at the loud consistent banging coming from the locked door… At least she wasn't screaming ….

"Dammit Kakashi! Open this Fucking door right now! Or I swear-" an even louder bang echoed throughout the small room, "I will kick down this door and chop of you di-"

Kakashi proceeded to ignore her by ramming headphones into his ears and blaring a song of some sort. He hated this day in age music- if it could really be classified as such- but he hated her shrilly screams even more.

Maybe jumping into a rabid crocodile tank? Surely the crocodile would have a more preferable personality than the little pink haired demon that was hell bent on ruining his life and draining his finances with her destructive personality.

How the hell did it come to this? 

What did he ever do to deserve being stuck with such an atrocious 21 year old banging on his locked bathroom door?

Sure, he was shamelessly late to everything- even one time forgoing the beginning of a funeral just so he could sleep in. He was blunt but honestly so (which was probably the problem actually.) He shirked his responsibilities and his dinner tabs off to his friends whenever the opportunity presented itself.

And yes, maybe there was that one time he told the little girl scout in front of the grocery store that the only reason her mother had agreed to sign her daughter up for such an annoying hobby was because she had felt guilty for the many times she had drunkenly wished she had gotten that abortion.

Maybe that had been a little uncalled for and probably untrue, and he quickly regretted saying anything once her mother's wrath was unleashed. But that wasn't the point… Although now thinking about it, he wouldn't ever with the wrath of that mother on anyone. Not his most hated enemies, not his unfaithful acquaintances, and not even Sakura. Who, at the moment, sounded as if she was scraping her nails down the door.

Sakura…. Sakura Haruno. A freak of nature no one should have to reckon with...

She hadn't been his objective. Far from it in fact; he hardly had any use for a girl like her.

Karma, he noted dully was making a full forced entry into his life

"Sakura, claw all you want at that door… But might I remind you that you're acting childish. Grow up and stop throwing a fit. You're being ridiculously unreasonable..

"Unreasonable?! The Hell with you, jackass! You kidnapped me!" Even louder crashes and the sound of breaking glass proceeded to occur in the small space in which Sakura had been locked in.

The commotion in the bathroom went on for another ten minutes before the peculiar sound of something being yanked from the wall had been heard.

Kakashi swiveled his head towards the bathroom and squinted his eyes. The occupant in the bathroom went silent.

"Sakura… Did you just rip the towel hanger off the wall?"

"...uh,no." He wasn't convinced.

And by God, he absolutely hated his life right now.

Small sobs began filtering out from where the loud commotion had been coming from. "Kakashi…" 

Her innocent pleading would have even broken the manliest man in the word...And it was sort of getting to Kakashi as well… A little…

He was never good with tears, ire he could handle but tears… No way

"Sakura… Listen." He paused yanking the headphones from his ears and made his way toward the bathroom.

She was silent. Either she was listening or choosing to ignore him, he chose to believe the former. Leaning on the door he quietly tried comforting her "I'm sorry for locking you in the bathroom… And kidnapping you… It was really rude of me-." 

She harrumphed in reply.

"I can unlock this door, and we can talk this out… I know this must be hard for you."

Kakashi's face pinched in slight disgust when she loudly blew her apparent snotty nose.

He took that as an agreement. "Is that a yes?"

"Yes."

A fraction of a smile slipped on his face and he easily unlocked the door.

The door slid open and he was staring into her beautiful jade colored eyes that were still misty with unfinished tears. Her whole demeanor looked weak and fragile with her hands behind her back like they were.

He did feel for her; they were both equally miserable with this unfortunate event..

He opened his arms offering her a hug.

He regretted it almost instantly when she took a couple steps forward as if to return the hug but paused short. Her innocent big green eyes changed from sad to pissed in just a blink and before he could step back, stop her, or slam the door and lock her back into the bathroom her hand reached up and swung hitting him hard in the head… With the towel hanger…

He really should have seen that coming…


End file.
